It’s unconventional to publish a serious post on April Fools, but I thought it appropriate to start off a new month with some gold nuggets. I’ve been really bad at posting them lately and it’s not that there haven’t been some great sermons to share, it’s just slacking on my part. So because I really want to keep up with these and continue to share some fantastic insight, here is one more of the thought-provoking messages from the past series, specifically on marriage, that I wanted to share with you.

On marriage
Jerry Maguire was wrong – our spouse was never intended to complete us. We’re expecting a person to do what they were never created to do. One of the biggest reasons for failure in marriage is that we think Jerry is right. And these unreal expectations lead to real problems. We start to think “I must have picked the wrong person” rather than recognizing it can only be a relationship with God that will complete us. When single, we needed to focus on our own worth under God’s value system. After saying, “I do,” we now need to focus on our spouse’s worth rather than our own – our job, til death do us part, is to value our spouse more than ourselves.

The questions they asked us to chew on were: Does my spouse live with a higher sense of worth because of how I treat and how I speak to him on a daily basis? What words are we using to make our spouse feel valued, supported and loved?

And to answer those I would have to say that I don’t always treat or speak to Ryan with respect or kindness. In fact, sometimes I can be a total brat for really no good reason or we argue about meaningless, silly things. Like who was right. And I don’t think it’s just me. I think we can all carelessly treat those we love the most pretty poorly at times because we are allowed to be our true, ugly selves with them. But aren’t the people closest to our hearts the ones who should see us at our best? Why do I let strangers see my good side and make my love see my worst side? It just doesn’t make sense.

If we abuse our relationships, we ruin the love and trust we’ve worked so hard to maintain. And not only that, we’re ruining God’s gift of marriage because His intention for our union was to build and transform one another (read more). As Ryan’s “other half,” I never want him to feel devalued because of my words or actions. He’s too important.

So from one fool to another, just remember to respect, honor and love the one God gave you to cherish for life…even if they can’t ever seem to find anything in the kitchen (ha). As my mom once said about my dad, “I don’t let the little things bother me because I’m just glad to have him around.” Puts things in perspective, doesn’t it?